A number of things happend today. Although they were generally small things, litterally, they had a huge impact on me. First off, I was looking for some new CD's to put in my car because I had the same 15 or so in my car for the longest time. I like to have a variety of stuff in my car depending on what I'm in the mood for...heavier music or something a little lighter. So I'm picking out my ussual rock stuff like Billy Idol, Twisted Sister, Scott Stapp, I threw in the compilation Goo album, a Smash Mouth CD for something lively and fun...then I'm looking for something a little more mellow. I came across Michael Buble which I got free from work..okay, thats cool..he's really awesome. Flip another page in my binder and see Vertical Horizon. Holy Crap. I haven't listened to them in a wicked long time. So I took out the "Everything you want" CD and throw it in there not thinking much of it other then I haven't listened to them in a really long time. Okay, so, I'm on my way to work today and decide to put it on. Pretty much, my story goes, I really forgot how amazing they are. I absolutly fell in love with them all over again. They're songs a really inspirational and helped me put perspective on a lot of things that are going on in my life right now. I'm in awe. I really need to listen to their more recent CD again..I don't remember much about it. *sigh* amazing.
"He's everything you want he's everything you need he's everything inside of you that you wish you could be he says all the right things at exactly the right time but he means nothing to you and you don't know why." although that last line isn't true by any stretch, the rest of it is. And thats pretty much why I'm so confused right now. Not that I'm going into details about that.
Another thing that happend today was, while I was working, someone came up and ordered a drink from me and after he paid and got it, he said "heres a gift for you" and he handed me a little pocket Bible. As strange and bazaar as I thought that it was, I also thought it was really nice. (even though he really needs to be careful about who he gives those to because someone could get really pissed off) I don't know, call me weird, but I like it and I'm keeping it....as a reminder to get my ass to church every Sunday and no more of this slacking bullshit.
In other news....Rachel drew on my arm at work today...I'm not thrilled.
So yeah, back to my confusion.
I'm soooooooooooooooooooooo confused. Probably the most confused I've ever been in my entire life. and I really don't know what to do. I guess what it boils down to is I can't do much, considering this is a really bad time to bring it up. I can't believe I chose now of all times to think about this. Couldn't it have happend a few months earlier?? seriously. I don't know, Like always, I'm expecting nothing to come of it. Thats just my luck of the draw. Although things could get interesting.
Now that I've left you all in the dark.......time to move on I guess...
Christmas shopping is 99.9% done. I just need to get one more present for my mom and thats IT. and I'm almost done writing my cards! Wooot! I'm really on top of things this year :-D
alrighty...thats it...time to go make a blanket and watch "Accepted" again... ;-)
posted by Lauren 11/27/2006 11:29:00 PM
Saturday, November 25, 2006
Ya know what really pisses me off? When people are fucking rude. I'm so sick of it. And it seems to be happening a lot more recently. Maybe its just this holiday season thats pissing everyone off, but seriously, why take it out on someone who did absolutly nothing to you? All I did was ask a question. Thats it. Thats all. And I get blown off. Hm, alrighty then. Whatever. I'm so sick of people. I really am. Make up your godamn fucking mind.
Seems like my group of friends is slowly diminishing to hardly anybody as well. I haven't talked to a good majority of them in a while. Sometimes I feel like crying about it. But then I realize that I don't have the energy for "fake" people. I have met some really amazing people in the past few months. Hannah being one of them. She is really awesome. I know I can talk to her about absolutly everything and she would never judge me or anything, and I know she would be nothing but supportive. Believe me, I'm really thankful for her. Thats why I made her a really awesome Christmas present. :)
Speaking of Christmas presents...I'm just about done shopping for everyone. Lauren showed me how to make blankets and I made like 4 of them for different people. lol. Made one for My cousin Russ's baby, Denise's grandson, Hannah, and my mom. They're really nice too..and very easy to make :). Maybe ill take pictures of them for you all to see...if I get ambitious.
Today's Susan's birthday....Happy birthday :)
I'm going to Church tomorrow....I'm gonna get my ass up and go. And i'm exhausted....which is why I think I'm gonna crash right now.
Comedy and laugher...a gift that was just returned to me recently after hell took over my life for a short time
the roof over my head
my wonderful church and pastor
Ugh...Thanksgiving was nice....tomorrow I have to be at work at 7am........oh the joy of Black Friday......... somebody save me...please?
posted by Lauren 11/23/2006 06:03:00 PM
Monday, November 13, 2006
Well, I haven't written in almost a week, but there has certainly been a lot going on, and I'm pretty freakin' happy at this current moment in time.
Friday was absolutly AMAZING. Incase you all forgot, that was the night of the Lewis Black show. I had the most amazing time EVER. I ended up leaving work early because Cristina scheduled me later then I had requested so I explained my situation and left at three. Went home, and James came over around four for dinner. I made a wicked good lasanga and he brought over a bottle of wine (the rest is in my closet ;) ). So we get in the Mustang and head down to Stamford. Was a long drive, but it was alright. Got a little lost getting there, but we made it. Stamford is a really cool town. If you live in CT and haven't been there, I highly reccomend it. It's like a mini New York City. The nightlife is awesome..seems like theres always something going on. The theatre that the show was at was really nice. the seats were a little cramped together, but still awesome. I was getting all jittery waiting for the show to start because I just love Lewis Black. LOL. One of the highlights of my night was James put is arm around me for a minute or two. Awwww ! Wow, am I a giggly girl or what? :-P The guy who opened for Lewis was actually really funny. Which is strange because normally opening acts suck. I can't think of his name though. Then, out comes Lewis. OMFG he was SOOOOOOO amazing. I wish I could follow him across the country and go to every single show. He is incredible. And the best part is...I got to meet him!!!!!!!!!!!!!! He was signing autographs in the lobby afterwords. James and I would even have a picture with him, but the shmo that took it had no idea how to use a camera phone so it didn't come out. >.<. But, I do have this:
^_^ how awesome is that?! I've had really good luck meeting people. And I'm happy for it!!!! The ride home was fun as well...lol. We were driving along..probably at about 70-80 miles an hour...then up comes this piss-ass acura integra that thinks its the shit. So, naturally, James bolts down the road at about a buck-20 and leaves that thing to eat his dust. HA! I LOVE IT!
Thursday I went to see Borat with Tom, and Rachel, and Molly, one of the new cashiers. I was a little sketched about it at first because well, haning out with work people outside of work isn't always cool. But it totally was.
Anywhoo... Saturday I think I just worked and that was it...
Sunday I went to Borders (even though I was off) to buy stuff. Employees could use their holiday savings earlier then everyone else. I Bought a ton of shit. lol. I had 50 dollars holiday savings, and two giftcards to use. I got Cars on DVD, a book that my friend wanted, Lewis Black's book, Season one of the Muppett Show, and a book called "Here's Johnny" which is about Johnny Carson. And I still have like 25 dollars left to spend ^_^. I got 100 dollars worth of shit for free! Tomorrow I'm getting "Accepted" and the new Family Guy box set. Yay!!! I'm sooo happy Accepted is out. I LOVE THAT MOVIE!
So...I've made some advacements in my life recently. One of the most important ones is I told Bill not to contact me anymore. Ive been doing a lot of thinking and I decided that I have been way too nice for too long and it has to stop somewhere. I can't continue being nice to someone who treated me badly and made me feel depressed and worthless. Lies, lies, and more lies. Thats all there was to that. He never liked me, never cared about me, never gave a shit. Just used me because I guess I was "easy" at the time and pretended to be my friend. His timing couldn't have been more perfect too. I had just broken up with Dom and definatly was not thinking clearly. But if anything good came out of this, I'm starting to realize who my true friends are. I'm also getting a lot smarter and I'm gaining more respect for myself. I've got big plans for my life and I'm not going to let someone like him pull me back to the starting line. I honestly don't know how one person can find it within them to be really cruel to someone else. I really don't. Whats the point exactly? What are you getting out of it? Maybe the satisfaction that you can make someone feel like shit? But thats not really satisfaction...and if that is satisfaction to you I think you need psychiatric care. Get some respect and put some faith in other people. We're all human beings. We all have feelings regardless of what some may show on the outside. Well, regardless, I hope Bill regrets this for the rest of his life. I really do, He doesn't have a clue what he's missing out on. At least I'm smart enough to know I'm a good person no matter what he's ever said to me though. And thats all that matters to me. The previous video was from Degrassi, and as ussual, I can relate a song to whats going on in my life, and I thought of that one.
In other news...I think I'm getting addicted to Dunkaccinos.
I decided that even though I'm stuck working retail, I'm not going to turn myself into a scrooge. I'm going to be happy this holiday season. I'm gong to decorate and be jolly like I was before. I just love the whole spirit of Christmas. I really do, even though work is going to be a death trap. However, I'm not going all out and buying a ton of presents...theres two friends I'm buying something for, and I'm getting stuff for my dad, my mom, and Denise. And thats IT. Can't afford to buy tons of stuff, as much as I would love to. I'm actually going to make Hannah a really nice gift. My friend Lauren has this website she calls "Blankets with Heart" (the link is under my list on the other side) What she does is she makes blankets and sends them out to kids with heart problems. Hannah has some sort of heart problem..it's nothing really serious, but I know she's not allowed to have a lot of caffine and stuff like that. But anyways, I'm going to make a blanket for her :). I think thats a really nice idea. And Christmas will be the perfect time :).
Well, Im getting a tad distracted talking to people...so I guess I'll end this. Later gators!
-a can of tuna...any kind -mayonaise -onion powder ( a good amount) -Garlic powder (a few sprinkles) -oregano (a few sprinkles) -Chives (a few sprinkles) -Emeril's "kick it up" red pepper sauce (a few drops)
trust me...its yummy.
Work Sucked tonight.....but I won't go into that.
*sigh*
I've had the most bone-head customers lately...seriously, I don't know what these people could possibly be smoking. lol.
So, past few days have been pretty decent...can't say anything negative really...which is a first.
Work on Monday night kinda sucked though. We didn't get out untill after 11 and I was forced to help the book people with whatever displays and stuff they had to do...So I was hunting through the kids sections which is NO picnic. And even though it looks better, it's actually a million times more confusing since the re-model.
Tuesday was Halloween. Obviously. I dressed up as a hippie, even though I didn't have anywhere Halloween related to go. I figured, what the hell. LOL. I even put make-up on. Which I refuse to do unless its Halloween, or I'm in a play. Heh, the last time I put on make-up was when Katie and Rae bribed me. I went out to CVS and bought some cheap shit that I'll probably give to my mom. So, did some errands and watched "Mean Girls".....and Umm...yeah. lol. It was actually a lot better then I thought it would be, but still not my cup of tea. But I do have a little more respect for Lindsay Lohan then previously. I liked her in the Parent Trap when she was younger, then when she started this slutty singer act I really hated her..now she's alright again.
Work last night went pretty well. It was taking FOREVER, but the last hour just flew by and I was a little behind on closing. But I still managed to get done by 10:20...just enough time to help Erich set up a DVD display. lol. He's a really cool guy..if he wasn't engaged with a kid, I would totally date him. :-P. Anywhooo....Scott gave his two weeks notice. THANK GOD.....it is seriously impossible to work with him. He's like 40 years old and the most incompitant person I have ever met in my entire life. His handwriting is absolutly aweful, and he writes like a 5 year old. I know thats a really bad thing to not like someone for, but Its just one of my pet peeves. But Yeah, thats not the only reason I don't like him. He leaves the cafe a mess all the time. I'm so fucking sick of coming in in the morning and finding the place looking like a tornado went through. He doesn't listen to a word Rachel or anyone else says, and its just annoying. But soon that will all be over. I hope the next person we get is semi decent.
Next Friday is the Lewis Black show!!!!!! I CAN'T WAIT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! I know I've said that a zillion times, but....UGH! He's just so awesome. Maybe I'll get to meet him...I've had good luck with meeting people ;-).
I suppose the most exciting thing thats happend is that Angelo called me the other day. It was wicked awesome to talk to him again..even though it was only for a few minutes. I told him that I'm probably going back out to L.A. sometime around my birthday next year, and he seemed excited about that :). I'm actually thinking about asking James to come with me. I honestly can't think of anyone else who would go with me. Except maybe Nichole. But who knows what she'll be up to by then. I don't know...it's still a long way off.
I'm in kind of a delema. The Goo Goo Dolls concert is on the same day as the Clay Aiken concert....what should i do?!?!?!??!?!?!?!?! lol.
*NOTE: unless otherwise specified, all of the graphics on this page were made by me. Please don't take them* Today I feel:
The Internet Feels:
DISCLAIMER:
All of the things written here are the views/opinions of ME. I'm not writing in here to make you happy. I'm writing here to make me happy. Thats why it's MY page. I don't care if we don't have the same tastes or disagree about things. We're all different, and you're welcome to your opinions. You may find many things about me that you don't like. But when it boils down to it, I don't care. If you don't like what I write, don't read it.
ABOUT ME:
I'm normal, but I'm completely different. I should have been born about 20 years before I actually was. Most of the music I listen to, the way I dress, and the way I think all go back to that time. As a result, I relate a lot better to people who are older than me. I'm completely independent and rely on nobody except myself (and God). I've been living on my own for 3 years. I didn't really go to college. My goals were just different than most peoples. I wanted to be out on my own and working rather than sitting in a classroom with no real direction. Besides, school is just not for me. I enjoy learning when I'm not forced to do it. I read constantly and am always learning new things. I hope to be involved with TV, music, or movies in someway. I would also love to write. I'm a realist. I have an excellent head on my shoulders. I have more common sense than most people. The most important thing in my life is my relationship with God.
The best advice I can give to anyone is laugh.....always :)
